We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
