Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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