You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Randomize
