He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
