So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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