He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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