i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize