it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I'm both gender and math confused
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
