who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
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