Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
you didnt know i had herpes?
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I have feelings that need drinking.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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