he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
