He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ðŸ˜ðŸ’€#pensacolaproblems
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
