What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Quick, to the slutcave!
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
