I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
