youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
