YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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