with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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