It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
