The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Randomize
