Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
