i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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