what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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