kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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