the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
