Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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