sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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