i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
