Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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