belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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