wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize