If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Randomize
