Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
