Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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