I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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