is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
