You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I just googled if crying burns calories
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Randomize
