that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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