There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
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