I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
