And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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