omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
