Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
