It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize