My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
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