you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
