he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize