My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
