"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I just want to make out with him forever
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
