dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
