All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
