Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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