So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
